Racing and Crashing

There are reminders all over my house of the people I love. My children grin at each other in black & white across our foyer, both dressed in wedding clothes, touching the love of their lives. An end table in the living room still holds playing cards my parents used. My sisters & I are standing in front of our shared cabin, the photograph now watching over my husband and me as we sleep. Dear friends peek out from bookshelves and counters, bringing to mind treasured times. Some are photographs, some are books, some are gifts. All remind me that life is precious. Friendship is precious. Family is precious. And time is fleeting.

With Ms. Lucy, who called herself my "Chocolate Mama," June 2007

In his interpretation of the Bhagavad Gita, one of my spiritual teachers, Eknath Easwaren, writes, "The other day someone was telling me that a friend of hers did not have long to live. I had to remind her that none of us have long to live."

I think about the transience of things.

My Prayer Covenant Group of clergywomen, September 2008

I've spent much of my time in high gear, racing from one responsibility to another. It wasn't until I crashed that I stopped. I was heading to a mandated clergy retreat 90 miles away. The car was set on automatic pilot. When I woke up, the car was barreling through weeds on the side of the road, going 65 mph. I didn't hit another car or a tree. I didn't crash, but something inside me did. My legs shook as I entered the retreat. I studied my friends. Life is precious and fleeting.

Stafford Cemetery, October 2007

Dallas Arboretum, March 2008

Do we think people will live forever? That we'll have time, eventually, to say what needs to be said, to invite others into our lives, to put aside grudges and high expectations? To cherish, really cherish the presence of those we say we love? To give our foremost attention to them?

Here's to the times we invite people into our messy houses, to join us at a dinner that isn't perfectly prepared. Here's to the times we tell the truth in love, or the times we keep our mouths shut and say, "How can I help?" Here's to the times we do hard things so that fairness may get a toehold in the doorway.

Here's to the times that we spend less time thinking about what we want and more time thinking about what others need. The times we say, "You may be right" even when we know we're right, &*^%@! Here's to the times we sit by someone, not conscious of what to say, but aware that we need to be there.

Here's to the times we stop racing and wake up before we crash.

Life is such a lovely gift. Let's slow down and breathe.